Awesome News Team

Daily News: Thursday, June 17, 2010

In Daily News on June 17, 2010 at 3:29 pm


1. BP CEO Tony Hayward, awaking from a 58-day coma, told a congressional committee he is “deeply sorry” for the massively destructive oil spill his company caused in the Gulf of Mexico.

I mean, that’s the only conceivable explanation for the lateness of this apology, right?

And, from the looking up synonyms for “touching” file: He also said he was “personally devastated” by the deaths of the 11 men aboard the Deepwater Horizon at the time of the explosion. He also mentioned that he “regrets” the “profound effect” those deaths had on the family members of those who perished.

Finally, he pledged that he “would not rest” until he “made it right“. Now that’s he’s just woken up from an epic two-month sleep, he’s got all the energy in the world.

2. Alberta Culture Minister Lindsay Blackett is backpedaling today after online backlash over his remarks about Canadian TV shows.

In yet another case of “why don’t people get that you can’t say in public what you say to a buddy at a bar,” Blackett said at a conference Monday “Why do I produce so much shit? Why do I fund so much crap?”


Daily News: Tuesday, June 15, 2010

In Daily News on June 15, 2010 at 10:10 pm


1. CBC News online is reporting that a Manitoba review panel has released its reasons for allowing Vince Li to take daily walks.

Perhaps it becomes more relevant when we mention that the walks are around his unfenced psychiatric hospital.

Oh, also, he’s the fellow that brutally murdered fellow passenger Tim McLean on a Greyhound bus nearly two years ago.

The CBC’s article doesn’t really mention the reasons the review panel listed, but does tell the whole grizzly story again. We suspect they posted the story, with it’s ever-so-clickable-and-slightly-deceiving title, for the same reason we are.

Wait, I thought we were calling out shoddy story choices? Oh irony. You’re my only friend.

2. A 17-year-old boy from Quebec has been charged after posting hateful racial comments on his Facebook page.

He has been charged twice, with uttering threats, and with inciting hatred on the internet.

Quarterly News: June 14, 2010

In Late Edition on June 14, 2010 at 10:24 pm

Nothing news-worthy happened in the last 74 days. What’s important is what’s…


1. U.S. President Barack Obama assured the world today that the ecosystem of the Gulf of Mexico will be “painful” for a while, but it will “bounce back.”

“I am confident that we’re going to be able to leave the Gulf Coast in better shape than it was before,” he said.

Of course by “we,” he means BP.

Well thanks for the pick-me-up Barry, but I think we kinda knew that.

2. Afghanistan! You’re rich!

A $1 trillion deposit of all the minerals modern life requires, like iron, cobalt, gold and lithium was discovered by Pentagon officials and American geologists.

The deposits could make Afghanistan a major world player in the raw minerals trade.

An internal memo from the Pentagon says, optimistically, that Afghanistan could become the “Saudi Arabia of lithium.”